The End

I started today assuming that it would be a very quiet day where I would post 3 different times, but this is Addroc and things never happen as they should. The day started with the head monkey asking me to come back down and talk to him before I did anything else. Through our meeting the Head Monkey told me that either the White Witch was going to step down or he was going to leave the business and sell it, yeah right I think we have heard that one before.

During the conversation The Head Monkey said “Did you hear about The Nutty Professor?” I hadn’t so I said “no, but what’s going on”. He proceeded to tell me that the Nutty Professor had told Smart that Addroc was in a bad financial situation and Smart told the Graphic Arts guy that he shouldn’t take the job because of this. The Head Monkey proceeded to tell me that The Nutty Professor telling Smart this information was like a lawyer breaching confidence with a client. He was extremely up set with The White Witch for not firing him right away.

Now there are two things that popped into my head as he was talking about this. 1st I know for a fact the nutty professor would never say anything like this to smart. 2nd I know if anyone it was my fault that smart knew about the guy coming back and the financial situation. So I was left with a dilemma do I walk away and not say anything or do I tell him that it was me who said something.

I couldn’t just sit there and let the Nutty Professor take the fall and have him lose his job so I told the Head Monkey that I’m pretty sure it was my fault and highly doubt The Nutty Professor would ever say anything about the poor financial situation. The Head Monkey of course dismissed what I said and told me that The Graphics guy told him that it was the Nutty Professor who told Smart.

I walked away from the meeting and honestly I was getting more and more pissed about the Nutty Professor losing his job over something he didn’t do. I decided I would tell Bill about how I thought it was me who tipped smart off and how I didn’t think it was the Nutty Professor. He at least believed me and said he didn’t think The Nutty Professor would have done this. But he said that we will never know for sure because nobody can talk to Smart. I told Bill that I would call smart today and ask him point blank if the Nutty Professor had told him about the bad Financial Situation. Bill said that would probably help The Nutty Professor and if I don’t mind it would be a good thing.

So I called smart and left him a message and I emailed him. Smart called me back and said no The Nutty Professor has never said anything but good things about Addroc. Smart also told me that he would never recommend his worst enemy to work at Addroc (which I agree, and will come into play later on in the story). Of course smart said these things a little more colorfully then I am.

I then pulled Bill into another meeting and told him that The Nutty Professor had nothing to do with what Smart told the Graphics guy. In fact, I told Bill, Smart would never recommend anyone to work here. To which Bill said he could understand why Smart would say this. I told him that if he wanted me to I would even go and talk to the White Witch about this.

Bill went into the White Witches office and told her that The Nutty Professor was not involved in this at all. She of course was happy to here this and proceeded to call the Nutty Professor into her office and tell him everything. As a side note here I was hoping the Nutty Professor would here nothing about this.

As you can imagine the Nutty Professor was really pissed at the Head Monkey for making those allegations. The Nutty Professor went down to talk to the Head Monkey in a closed door meeting, to which I thought was the end for the Nutty Professor.

As I was getting ready to go on my walk I saw the Nutty Professor sitting at his desk going through his desk. To me it looked like he was going through his desk the last time and was getting ready to leave for good. This is when I called Smart for the 2nd time today, I wanted to warn him that he was probably going to have to call the nutty professor and let him know that he had nothing to do with all of this.

I got back from lunch and I asked Bill what was going on. Bill told me about how the White Witch had told the nutty professor about the allegations about him and how I had come forward disputing these allegations and nothing was going to happen to him because of this.

Now during all this I was actually trying to do some work too. One of the odd things about my last day, oh wait my entire last day was odd, was that I was to take my computer and turn it into another graphic arts computer for someone they had made an offer to but yet still hadn’t gotten back to them yet, more on this story later.

During all this I was talking to Melman who said she really wanted to get out of Addroc and she was going to get her resume ready and was trying to get a list of references together. She went on to tell me how she doesn’t really know anybody here and Baby Jack Jack was her only really good reference. Taking the philosophy of not wanting your worst enemy to work at Addroc I told Melman she could use me as a reference.

The end of the day came about 3:00 PM, and I decided to make my rounds and say goodbye. I started off by saying goodbye to Melman who actually started crying. She said it was because she was so overwhelmed with being the only one left at Addroc, out of myself, baby jack jack and smart. I guess she thought Smart and her were still good friends.

Of course I went around to everyone else and everyone was really nice and congratulated me and wished me luck, it was actually really nice. I had to interrupt the Nutty Professor and The White Witch to say goodbye though. The White Witch actually gave me a hug goodbye and squished her boobs against me, actually I think that is a draw back to hugging any female with big boobs but all I could think about was the Grand Canyon made of Jello.

She then said thank you for coming clean about the incident with The nutty professor and how it really helped her Bill and the Nutty Professor, and how thankful she was. I even saw a tear come out of the White Witches eye right then.

To end the day just as I was about to leave the Professor told me that the Graphic Arts person, yes that’s a second one, turned them down and was not going to come here to work. I guess that’s one more day of my life wasted at Addroc.

I thought about summary post about my experiences at Addroc, but decided that in one day I got a snap shot of what it was like for 2 years at that place. Back Stabbing, Lying and Tears. I think for me this sums up what Addroc is and what it will always be.

Like smart I thank all of you for reading, it has been really fun. I also would like to thank Smart for being my friend and getting me out of jail.

THE END


Smarter

Smarts Story Ending Post

With Dumber becoming Smarter and moving over here with me at this new company our Addroc blog has come to an end. We started this blog on July 7th of 2005 and it is amazing that the last post from Dumber will end it all today on exactly the same day one year later. Seems like a fitting end to a great book.

As you all remember it started with the frustration that Dumber and I felt at Addroc. This blog became a way for us to get the crap of the day off our shoulders. As we wrote it we released it to the blog and to you for the reading. Sometimes it was sad stuff, sometimes we were angry, and sometimes everyone could laugh but in the end it was a way for Dumber and I to cope with the characters that made up Addroc.

For those of you that have read this from the beginning and kept with it I hope it comes as a good ending as every book should end with the main characters moving on to a better life. The rest of the Addroc characters we all know will continue their path of stupidity as they did before Dumber and I were there. Most likely a new Dumb and Dumber will be hired to take our places and the cycle will repeat itself. I know Dumber and I will have to discuss what we want to do with our writings. Initially we will most likely keep them residing in our blog until such time as we deem necessary to delete it. We ponder about sending it to publishers and who knows maybe one of them would pick it up and people could buy it at the local bookstore someday and read about the two crazy co-workers lives.

I have had to do some thinking about how I wanted this post to end. I initially posted my last post when I became Smarter but since I had posted a couple time and felt that with Dumber moving on and the end I wanted to clear and note some final thoughts. In the end I would like to address each character but in reality there are only four people to address.

First is the Head Monkey. The man that lives life believing the best way to make a sale is with Reverse Honesty. I can’t remember if we covered this theory of his in a post or not so I will briefly touch on it now. Reverse Honesty is lying, how is that for a Readers Digest version? I think he not only used Reverse honesty with making sales but in the way he treated everyone around him. I think he lived it with lying to his wife, to his clients and customers, and to himself. He is a person I never respected and often found myself trying to navigate the halls and not cross paths with any more then necessary.

Second is “The CEO”. She is completely over her head with no business sense at all. She flounders in her stupidity and uses negative comments, belittling tactics, and undermining techniques to all around her to hide her ignorance of any subject. This is the same model most bullies use in the world. If it wasn’t for her game of spider, afternoon naps, and drug concoctions she would most certainly have nothing to do.

Third is our Bill. Bill could easily be names Kermit as he is just a puppet of “The CEO”. He is at this point just trying to make it through another couple years of work and retire. His age, degrading health, and for the most part lack of true leadership skill makes him nearly un-hirable. “The CEO” and Head Monkey both know this and pulls the strings for Bill to do their dirty work. Bill tries to play it off as they are nuts and puts them, “The CEO” and Head Monkey, down with his own underhanded comments so he looks like the good guy to the lower workers but people have figured him out and that is now beginning to collapse on him. He deserves to work there and be their puppet as he is in reality not much different himself.

Fourth is really only mentioned as he is caught in this. That is The Nutty Professor. The Nutty Professor is a consultant that works for him self and like most small businesses have one major client that they do 80% of the work for The Nutty Professor has Addroc. As he and his wife have become both my friend and a personal computer client for me I feel his pain. The last time I was at their house I looked over his newest brochure he was creating to try and get more work. He and his wife both asked me about any other clients I might have or know for them to grow work. In one sentence from his wife she said The Nutty Professor would like to find a good place to work also as she was talking about my new company. I hope he can find that growth and eventually remove himself from Addroc.

I could rattle on for hours on all these people, ohh wait that is what this blog did for a year. A blog that we thought would only last a couple weeks and we would tire of it or run out of things to post on. We were wrong and could post on this for years to come. I only wish I had started it a couple years earlier. I am still proud of it though and will miss it some but it is time to move on. I really do not ever see myself working for such a place again but if I do I will defiantly use it as a tool to release stress again.

I would like to thank all the people that have read it and commented on Addroc this last year. I know I talk for both Dumber and I when I say WE loved your comments, insight, humor and wisdom. We even talked about who got the most comments or sometimes who even got A comment to a post. In a way you all became a part of Addroc with us an I hope you all carry one piece of advice from me when I say “If you ever find yourself working for a place like Addroc, blog it and get out as soon as possible.”

Thanks to all
Smart (aka Dumb)

High turnover

Once again everything was very quiet yesterday, I hope the dust has settled until after I leave. One of the funniest parts about this week though is to sit and watch the professor get ready to take over the management of the computer department. The professor is a fairly intelligent man and understands a lot about business, but he does not have a clue about how an IT department should work or even what goes on in one.

He has been bombarding me with all sorts of questions, these questions range from basic networking questions to how I think the department should be structured. He keeps telling me to write everything down or he will forget. He actually asked me to write down how to shut down the server. He also asked me to write down how to add and delete a user to the server. Now I have 2 problems with this: 1st adding and deleting a user is actually a fairly complicated process and I am sure I would miss steps when writing it down. 2nd I had never added or deleted a user until smart left Addroc and I had to learn through the school of hard knocks. Am I really the best person to be teaching him how to do this? I don’t think so, but yet the Professor thinks I am.

One of the things Addroc wanted me to do before I left was updating the Accounting software we use. I didn’t think it would be a big deal at all so I said sure. I started looking over the installation instructions and started to realize this would be a much bigger pain then I ever thought it would be. I emailed smart to see if there was any issues I should know about before I ran the update. About 10 minutes later I get an actual phone call from smart saying don’t do it. He called to warn me that I would end up screwing up the entire system and would end up creating tons of work for my last 3 days. Thanks Smart for the warning!!! In case your wondering there is no way I’m doing this install, I’ll save it for the next sucker.

Melman told me that today is the day the new guy is going to be fired. I don’t know if I believe her or not but it has made me think about Addroc and the upstairs finance department. There are 5 different positions upstairs, of which in the past year 5 people have left or were forced to leave these positions, that is if new guy is fired. First Baby Jack Jack left, and then Marlin walked out one day without telling anyone. Next came Smart and in a couple of days I will be gone. And finally it’s only a matter of time that new guy is canned. The most senior person up here is Bill who has been here about 5 years and then follows Melman who is coming up on 3 years.

Counselor Troy, HR lady, informed me yesterday that she turned in her resignation and she is moving on to be a stay at home mom. If any one is interested in working at Addroc there are a few openings.

One more employee story gone bad for you. Last week I heard a rumor that a guy that used to work here was thinking about coming back to Addroc. This person is a friend of Smart’s so I emailed Smart to find out what was going on and why this guy would come back to Addroc. Smart talked to him found out he was coming back based on a big fat raise and the Skipper being his boss. Smart being the friend he is gave him a stern warning about the financial situation and the fact the Skipper isn’t going to last. I found out yesterday that this guy decided to stay at his current employer and not coming back to Addroc. Once again good job Smart!!!

Dumber

Bottle Caps

Monday was an extremely quiet day, I’m guessing they are letting some of the dust settle from last week, also about ¾ of the people took the day off so they could have a 4 day weekend. I felt like the dog that had been beaten one too many times though, I kept looking over my shoulder waiting for something to happen.

Since nothing happened on Monday I thought I would share with you a funny story that happened last week. Smart and I were emailing back and forth when he told me that his company and the one I’m moving to has done work in the past for Addroc and still has some settings in their system for when they did work. Well a light went off in my head that there are comments throughout Addrocs main program with the beginning of ffi, these are the same initials of my new company (abbreviations of company may have been changed to protect the innocent). I now remember Bill telling me they had a company doing some work on their program right before I started but they were kind of expensive. It’s the same company I’m going to work for now.

Yesterday was of course the 4th of July which means I didn’t have to come to work, so automatically it’s a good day. Monday we went to the store and told the kids to pick out some candy for the fireworks, it’s a nice time killer while we wait. Being the kid I am I also got to pick a box out, and guess what I picked…..that’s right bottle caps.

Now we get there and we met some friends and had my wife’s family with us. Its time to pull out the candy and I realized my error, everyone expected me to share my candy. First it was my brother in-law then some of the kids. I then made a mistake and put the bottle caps down and one of our friend’s kids picked the box up and started to carry it around. All of a sudden every kid in our group, 10 in all, was eating some of MY bottle caps. Being the adult I could not just walk up push her down and take the bottle caps back, that and her dad works at the sheriffs department and I’m pretty sure he would have arrested me. In the end they ate all my bottle caps and I was left with an empty box saying “Oh that’s ok”.

Dumber

VP of what?

I was offered to keep my job again on Friday. This time no more money was thrown out to me it was a change in management. The Professor came pulled me into a conference room a glow with power after talking to the White Witch. He asked me “Would you like to stay if I was your manager?” I said “That’s really nice but no thank you.” Notice this time I didn’t wait to talk to my wife.

He went on to tell me that not only was he going to help interview for the IT position he was going to be the manager of that position now, not Bill anymore. The professor continued to tell me that he then asked her what his new title would be. The White Witch then mentioned two words that are more important to the professor then air itself, “How about the VP of Operations.” He being the level headed person he is said “How about you think about that over the weekend and if you still think that’s a good idea you let me know Monday.” Any votes if she still thinks a good idea?

Through our conversation I told the professor that I thought the White Witch was going to get rid of Bill soon. The professor turned right around and said yes she mentioned that to me. Once again the Professor being very level headed asked her if Bill still had value in the accounting department. To which she said yes. So for now Bill stays.

If I didn’t only have 4 posts left I would probably re-name the professor to Edmund. I have been amazed at how quickly he will join the White Witch’s side for some little pieces of candy. I will not have a post for tomorrow as it is the 4th of July.

The professor was on cloud nine all day dreaming about his new job title. I wanted to look at him and ask him “What do you think you would be VP of? Jack shit is what you would be VP of I tell you.” The Professor officially can never find out about the Blog.

The penguins took me out to lunch Friday and it was fairly uneventful, one of the penguins father is very sick and he got a call from his mother asking him to come home while we were at lunch. One thing I noticed was how much these guys looked at the ladies. Now I’m not saying looking at a nice looking lady is bad, but when you say hey penguin check her out and everyone’s head turns, you might have crossed the line.

I like Highlanders idea for the mistletoe, I’m going to have to think about it.

In case you’re wondering the White Witch is wearing a brown shirt that is see thru shirt and a black bra.

Dumber

Power struggles

The White Witch again started my day off with calling me into her office, no smartass not for a lap dance, printer problems. I easily fixed her printer problems and she looked at me and said:

WW: “Are you ready to talk to me”
ME: “Sure, My wife and I agree that its time for me to move on”
WW: “Well we will be sad to see you go. Now before you leave I will need you to write up a job description of what we need”
ME: “OK”

I quickly left and started thinking what in the world am I going to write. I thought I would get some help from Smart, as it turns out all of these very important job points come from him, I don’t see a need to add any.
1) Ability to keep a straight face while the Jello Canyon is bent over you while you work on her PC.
2) Someone who enjoys the smell of cheap perfume on old women.
3) Must be able to work in a MCSE (Multiple personality, Chaotic, Secureless Environment)
4) Must be older and not have kids or a wife they enjoy being with so family outings don't interrupt the scheduled MUST work hours.
5) Eating lunch at 11:30 sharp cannot be a problem as changing from this time might need to have excessive paperwork filled out and approved.
6) We prefer stupid people we can take advantage of and will not talk back or try to change the business model.
7) To act Dumb and Naive a huge Plus
8) Ability to know when donuts are carried in downstairs even with thesmell of perfume filling the upstairs.
9) Can BRAVE the firing line gauntlet of managment eyes leading fromwork area to bathroom or any other needed function your job might needyou to go.
10) Must have stiff neck muscles to nod in agreement and look concernedwhile listening to all of co-workers ailments.
11) Ability to sleep and type with eyes open looking like your workingon that next useless report.
12) Knows not to interrupt naptime and look the other direction asthis is common for upper management.
13) Extra effort given to men as there have already been problems withwomen and harassment on upper management level. More credit given if he wears a thong!

She also mentioned that this was going to be a management position that would report directly to her and not Bill. Oh do I feel sorry for this next person.

I have noticed in the past couple of days an extreme power struggle occurring. The Head Monkey wants to get rid of The White Witch and is formulating a plan that includes putting the Skipper in charge. Now I think the White Witch has detected this plan and is in the process of saving her own butt. She is starting off by deflecting all blame from herself of me leaving onto Bill. And is starting to harp on Bill, really bad, for New guys performance and lack of training.

Step 2 is to do everything possible to get rid of the Skipper. She gave him his 90 day review yesterday and told him she didn’t have time to do it and he wasn’t getting anymore money and he just needed to sign it. She also called one of the long time penguins into her office to find out what he thought of the skipper. The Penguin said the skipper wasn’t worth anything and thought they should get rid of him.

Step 3 she is starting to get more and more involved in the business and attempting to drive where Addroc is going, which is down.

I am also wondering they will let me finish out my 2 weeks? Addroc has a habit of dumping people before their 2 weeks are up.

The Professor just came over and said that the White Witch called him and said that she was going to take over the hiring of the new IT person. But she said that she was going to have The Professor help in her interviewing process. Can we all say Bill is out of here.

Dumber

Poisnoning my soul

The White Witch called me into her office yesterday as I walked in she stayed by the door and closed it behind her. She then proceeded to walk over to her desk and turn on some loud music with lots of bass in it. The White Witch started to grind her hips back and forth, ok as much as any 68 year old woman with bad hips can, and rubbing her hands all over herself. Fist to come off were her pants, she had to actually sit down to do this, but I was surprised to see a lacey red thong poke out, I didn’t know you could purchase them that large but I guess you can buy anything on-line. Next to come off was her see thru shirt, and let me say it truly was amazing to see the grand canyon made of jello without an obstructed view. That’s when she started gyrating back and forth saying “you know you want to stay, you know you want to stay.”

Ok maybe it didn’t happen like that but smartass put the thought in my head and I had to go with it.

Wednesday started off with the White Witch coming out to get me to come in and talk to her. I went in with the plan to just stick to my story about how I was going to a place with more opportunities for me to learn. Of course she wouldn’t accept this as an answer and wanted more detail, I tried to pick safe items that wouldn’t get anyone in trouble. We ended our conversation with the agreement that I was leaving and nothing could be done about it.

About 2 minutes later the professor came upstairs because The White Witch called. As I found out later she told him the entire reason I was leaving was because I couldn’t take the pressure of the new scheduling system we were building. He got done and she called Bill into her office.

While Bill was in her office I went for a walk. The Head Monkey found me and asked me to go for a little walk with him. He said that he was really upset at me leaving, not at me, but the fact The White Witch and Bill let it happen. He asked me if I would be honest on my exit interview as to why I’m leaving. He said that he was going to get rid of the White Witch over the next six months and if I were honest, say the White Witch is crazy, it would help his case against her. He also mentioned if she wasn’t gone in six months he would be. I left with my head spinning with thoughts. If I could honestly help the people of Addroc get rid of the White Witch I would, but yet how do you say someone is crazy nicely.

After I got back upstairs the White Witch pulled me into her office again with her and Bill. This time they decided to make me a counter offer. Now I never told them what I was getting at my new job but their offer was exactly what my new job is paying and they also gave me more vacation. As an added bonus I would not report to Bill but directly to the White Witch. The funny part to me is now the jobs pay wise are the same, now the question is am I leaving for more money or because of the environment?

The rest of the day I was completely useless and wandered around aimlessly with my head spinning.

I’m sitting down to post and I’m thinking I probably should have just laughed at them when they offered me more money. There is no way I’m going to stay, I knew that as soon as the offered but I was trying to be nice and say I needed to talk it over with my wife. I’m not leaving because of the money, I’m leaving because Addroc is slowly poisoning my soul.

Dumber

Broken Handle

Tuesday started off once again with me dreading coming into work, I knew Bill was going to tell the White Witch of my decision and I didn’t really want to deal with it. About 7:30 we got a call from HR telling us the White Witch was not going to be in for work, not that she does anything normally, but boy I wish I could do the same.

There where many emotions that came out of my meeting with Bill yesterday one of which was pity, I truly felt sorry for bill. I felt like I was sitting across the table from a fellow prisoner and I had just been released and that he needed to stay. It was a really weird feeling.

Smart even came up in our conversations. Bill was telling me about how when Smart started he wanted to work 6:00 AM to 3:00 PM so he could do some work on his house. Bill, under orders from the White Witch said no the White Witch needs us here from 7 am to 4 pm. Bill continued to tell me how Smart mentioned to the White Witch that he would like to work from 6 am to 3 pm and she agreed. Bill told me that from that time forward Smart new he could go to the White Witch and he, Bill, was not really his manager anymore.

What does that have to do with me? I could start to see the same thing happening to me. I was getting more and more of my direction from the White Witch and Bill was getting more and more distant from me. I knew in 6 months to a year Bill would be extremely un-happy with me and would be doing everything to get rid of me.

Once I found out the White Witch was not going to be coming into work I decided to go around and just tell everyone, I was going to wait until she found out, just to be nice. Pretty much everybody was really happy for me but sad for the company. Some of the people where completely shocked but most where just simply happy.

One of the penguins who was out of town yesterday called me today and said “so I hear you’re a short timer”. I was surprised he had already heard the news. He proceeded to ask me “So good old Bill wasn’t coming through with more money?” I tried to stay diplomatic and say “That was part of it”. The Penguin then told me that he had to fight the White Witch for 2 weeks before she would give one of his employees a raise.

This made me think that maybe the real issue is that Bill wasn’t willing to fight for me in the beginning or maybe this was part of the game they played. They won’t give you a raise until you threaten to leave and get really angry. Whichever way it doesn’t matter I don’t play that game and I didn’t feel so sorry for Bill.

Now for my funny story for today:

I was having a little sit down time, as Smart called it, or as most people would call it I was taking a dump. I had completed the task at hand and got up to flush the toilet and as I pushed the handle down, this is the type of toilet you find in a home with a separate tank and all, the handle snapped off and fell to the floor.

I looked down at the handle on the floor then at the toilet then at the handle on the floor and thought to myself “You have got to be kidding me”. I figured I had 2 options I could leave the toilet the way it was and go get Schneider the maintenance guy and have him fix the toilet with my poo still in it. Or I could just leave the handle on the floor and not flush the toilet and walk out the bathroom and no one would know who did it. I was leaning towards option 2 when it dawned on me I could take the lid off the toilet flush it and then I picked up the handle and stuck it back on and hoped it would break on someone else next time.

And yes The White Witch showed up today but you will have to wait until tomorrow to here the stories.

Dumber

Two Week Notice

Monday started out with me being extremely nervous about turning in my resignation, Bill wasn’t there so I had to wait.

I was talking to the secretary penguin at my desk when Melman came over and said look at the bug I found crawling on my mouse, she brought it over on a white sheet of paper and set it on my desk. I looked at it said gross and told her she should probably kill it because its probably going to jump. Now a quick side note, I know nothing about bugs but this bug looked like it would jump.

Melman picked up the piece of paper decided to take another look before she squished it. She held it up to her face then out of no where she let out a very loud scream. You know the type, you fall into a hole and break your leg and you let out a scream of pain, that would be close to her scream. The bug jumped off the piece of paper and onto her face, where she claims it bit her cheek.

She quickly ran into the bathroom to make sure the bug was not in her hair. New guy and The White Witch both came over to see what was going on. I on the other had was laughing extremely hard at her. She came out for a couple of minutes then went back in, when she came out she told me that she had to make sure the bug was not in her clothing either.

I was talking to Cowboy Penguin and Melman and Cowboy showed us, for some reason, his driver’s license picture. Melman looked at the picture and said “You look just like Charlie Sheen”. I looked at the picture and she was absolutely right he is a dead ringer for a young Charlie. For the rest of the day I was giving him a hard time and calling him Charlie, I think I will have to continue this trend for the rest of my time here.

I have also noticed that management is watching us like hawks any time you start talking with a fellow employee. While I was talking with Melman and Charlie (Cowboy) the White Witch came out of her office looked at us and glared at us and I could tell making a mental note of us messing around. I’m sure she will tell Bill of our slacking.

Bill finally came in yesterday about 1:00 PM and everybody and their sister needs to talk to him. While I was waiting to talk to him The White Witch came over and started yapping to him. In the mean time Melman went to get a print off the printer when all of a sudden she doubled over in pain. I sat there watching her, horrified that she might either throw up on the floor or die right there. She walked over to Smart’s old area still doubled over in pain going oh ah ouch this really hurts.

I went over and got her chair for her to sit down in and finally others noticed that Melman was about ready to die right there. New guy came over to join me first, then the Nutty Professor joined and finally the White Witch and Bill noticed and came over. The White Witch of course got very close to Melman while it looked like Melman was going to throw up.

I actually had to stop myself from laughing at the sight of all 5 of us standing around watching Melman getting sick. I was also thinking that the smell of the White Witch was enough to make me sick I’m sure it’s not helping Melman right now. As we all watched The White Witch and The Nutty Professor had a very long discussion of whether it was her gal bladder or her appendices that was her problem. It all culminated with the White Witch pushing Melman back to Melman’s desk in Melman’s chair. It was one of those special addroc moments.

After all that I finally talked to Bill about my resignation. He was surprised but yet I think he was actually happy for me. He asked me if it was just about the money. To which I said that was part of it but honestly it was about the craziness that is Addroc. He completely understood though and said that he was hopping to not be here too much longer. It was actually a very anti climatic moment. I think the real fun will start today when he tells the White Witch.

Dumber

Letter of resignation

Friday was a truly boring day: no Bill, No White Witch and No Head Monkey means nobody came up to bother us. I thought I would give my resignation letter a try.

Dear Addroc,

I am very happy to inform you that July 7, 2006 will be my last day of work. I greatly appreciate the opportunity to come and work for you.

As I sat down to write my letter I decided to be completely honest with you as to why I am leaving this position.

1st ever since dumb left I have been doing his job and mine and when I asked you for some more money Bill, you said you would need to talk to the White Witch and get back to me and you never did.

2nd I can’t stand the craziness anymore. Everyday I kept thinking it would start to balance but in the 2 years I have been here it hasn’t.

3rd I can’t take looking at you the White Witch in your see thru shirts showing all of us the Grand Canyon made of Jell-O

4th I can not take one more day of listening to Melman complain about her sicknesses

5th I am tired of everyone’s negative attitude, and I don’t want to end up like them.

6th this company has no future with you, Bill and The White Witch, here.

I should probably stop now before I get too carried away. But I wish you luck in finding someone as Dumb as me who will stick around way to long.

Bill will not be in until this afternoon, so I have not given my 2 week notice yet.

No office for you

I came in yesterday and was walking over to my desk to begin my day when the White Witch came running out after me. She told me in a very panicked voice “When you get settled we need to talk about an email that the skipper sent out”. I got everything settled as slow as possible and went into her office.

The big problem is that The Skipper is asking for Microsoft Office to be put on all the Graphic Arts computers. Now the White Witch is strongly opposed to this for two reason’s, 1st she doesn’t think they need it and 2nd she thinks it will cause their machines to crash. I told her that 2 out of the 3 already have office and we have the licensing to do the other one. She looked at me all accusatory and all and said “Why do they have office, what do they need it for?” I just looked at her and said “I don’t know”. I could then see it in her face, Damn smart something else he went behind my back on (Sorry smart that’s the way it looked to me). Needless to say the one lone Graphics guy is not getting office.

As I was leaving Wednesday night there was an older woman sitting in the entry way filling out a job application. I really didn’t pay much attention to her I figured it was for an open penguin position. Melman came in and said that she was meeting Bill for an Interview. He is interviewing for new guys position. Let me be very clear on this one, new guy has no clue that they are interviewing for his position. They just keep him working and teaching him new things the entire time knowing they are going to can his butt in the next week or so.

Ridicules asked an interesting question “what was I going to blog about now”. I’m not sure if I will keep blogging. I don’t want to start blogging about the people I work with again, I don’t want to take the risk. And I don’t know about the rest of my life, I’ll let you all know, if you care.

Dumber

Don't touch my screen

Yesterday I accepted the job, the unfortunate part now is I have absolutely no motivation to do anything at all at work. Over the next couple of days I will write a fake letter of resignation and post it then also post my real one and see which one you like more. I also will not be telling Bill about my resignation until Monday. He will be gone both Thursday and Friday of this week and I don’t know how The White Witch will react and I would prefer not to deal with her to much.

Yesterday was also a pretty ho hum day most of my excitement came when I saw the White Witch and The Nutty Professor headed towards me. The White Witch took up her position standing as close as possible on my right side. She asked me to pull up a particular report and then proceeded to point at my screen talking about the report. Now mind you she didn’t just point at my screen she was putting her fingers all over my screen, leaving her greasy finger prints all over it. If I would have turned my head just 90 degrees the Jello canyon would have been in full view for me too. I’m not going to miss that.

The Gardening Penguin also told me today that she was going to start walking with me. This actually made me somewhat sad because, if she actually does, I will only get to walk with her a couple of times. She’s a pretty nice person and I would like to walk with her more.

HB - I won’t be calling myself smarter until my absolute last day, there is still a chance of something happening that keeps me from being smarter. Also Smart did not become smart until his last post and I think that’s fitting. And no there will be no pictures of our man love.

Dumber

Offer accepted

Much to the suprise of everyone, I'm sure, I accepted the offer today. I will probably be starting at the new job on July 10th, might be the 17th depends on them though. One of the funny things about the 10th is thats the day I started at Addroc 2 years ago, I will have worked at addroc for 2 years to the day.

Its kind of unreal though and a little bit of a let down. There are so many good things I could do at Addroc, but the craziness is overwhelming. Really that's what it comes down to, I need better working conditions.

And don't worry I will keep you all up to date over the next couple of weeks on what happens.

Still Dumber

I don't care

Yesterday was a huge day for me, my parole officer called and said you are free to go. Being the ever picky prisoner I have opted to review the offer and make sure its all good. On the surface the 2 companies are very similar in the benefits package they offer, however I will be making more money.

For me though it goes much deeper then any of that because it doesn’t matter how much money Addroc offers me I will not stay, I can’t take the craziness anymore. I also think there will be more possibilities for me to do more things with more technologies. I am having a very hard time working today, because I don’t care!!!!

Although just because things are looking up for me, Melman is getting more and more stressed out. Now I will give Melman credit here, having to pay bills when there is no money is not a fun job. She is constantly getting calls from people asking when they will get paid threatening to put us on hold. Not very fun.

The stress is really showing now, she is complaining about shooting pain in her arm and her ear hurting. I thought about telling her that the shooting pain might be a sign of a heart attack, but I decided she was probably just making it up anyway.

It was really weird to have people talk to me about the future at Addroc and all I wanted to say was I don’t really care, this place is just going to be a bad dream for me in a year.

Dumber

An Offer

I just got off the phone with Smart's new place of employment and they are making me an offer. I am very happy and can bearly stop smiling, I'm about ready to start swinging from the rafters.

Dumber (Soon to be Smarter)

A Call?

I don’t really remember what happened yesterday. I forgot my cell phone at home yesterday so my wife called me and said I had a message from the VP of Software at Smart’s company asking me to call her back. All of a sudden my mind started racing I blocked everything out that happened in the day and I started day dreaming. Here is a quick list of some of the things I was dreaming about for the rest of the day and night:

They just want to tell me no thank you (This is actually an option. One of the reason’s smart likes the company is because they seem to treat people with respect. I could see the VP calling me to tell me they went with another candidate.)

They want to offer me the job
When I start should I take fun dips for smart and I to share?
On my first day should I jump in smarts lap giving him hugs continullaly saying thank you thank you while everyone looks on.
Could I throw a bouncy ball from the 2nd floor and hit smart?
They are just going to tell me no
They are going to offer me the job
Maybe they will double my salary (Not realistic).
What will Addroc say when I give my 2 week notice?
What will I do without see thru shirts and jello canyons?

I will post again when I find out what’s going on.

Dumber

Super Model

Gollum finally brought donuts in Friday after a long dry period of no Donuts. I was so happy I didn’t even wait the required 15 minutes before I ran down stairs. I also couldn’t help myself and ate 2 donuts, don’t worry though I got one of the donuts in the Monkey’s area and the other in the penguin area. Now no one is the wiser.

I also had a thought to ponder today, are 2 guys at work gay? First let me start off with a couple of stereotypes about gay men; first they usually take showers at least once a day. 2nd they usually shave / keep their beards groomed. 3rd they usually dress nicer then your average hippie.

Now why would I be surprised these 2 guys are gay? One of the guys is really quiet and doesn’t talk much. The other guy is alien boy and claims to have been abducted by aliens on three different occasions. They both look like, on the average day, they have just rolled off a 2 week bender following the grateful dead around. No showers, un-kept beards and dirty clothes.

Now what makes me think their gay? They live together and are putting a deck on their house. One of them, the quiet one, hasn’t shown up to work the past 3 days. In response to that one of the Penguins said “I wonder how long alien boy will last”. Are they gay or just really good friends.

The White Witch came over to show Melman a picture of her new grandson. The problem with this is that he is 28 years old, a product of Tammy fay and Jim Baker getting married, male model. The pictures that The White Witch showed Melman were of her grandson in his cheesecake modeling poses. He had his shirt undone showing his chest and low rise pants on. I don’t think anyone else can bring in pictures of obscure relatives and show them around like that.

Dumber

The Excel Folder

Thursday started out by with one of the sales monkey’s calling me and asking me “If I delete an excel file off the desktop will I still have a copy?” I said “let me come down and see.” My thought was that if it’s a short cut it would be fine to delete.

I got down there and of course it’s the file so if he delete’s its gone. Here’s how our conversation went:

Me “no you can’t delete you need to move it to a different location. Where would you like to move it?”

Monkey “Can I move it to the excel file?”

Me “Excel is a program not a folder”

Monkey “I don’t know just where all my excel files are”

Me “The U drive?”

Monkey “Yeah, now how do I move the files?”

Me “You need to highlight……” you get the point.

The White Witch came and visited me today asked me if I could find out what this order number was for this job. She said she was in the accounting package and that it wasn’t listed in there, which was true. I simply opened another program and easily found the information for her.

I thought about explaining to her that she could have opened another program while the accounting one was open but then I realized she had that look in her eyes that her medication was not well balanced. I figured the less I poked the stick at the chemically imbalanced lady the better I would be.

I forgot to mention that the newest addroc employee stopped in yesterday, he was born 3 days ago to one of the oompha loompas. This is the lady that started at addroc at the age of 15 with here mother. She might have her GED now but dropped out of high school to work here. Her boyfriend works here too as another Oompha Loompa. This kid will start in about 15 years to the day, I hope Addroc makes it that long.

Dumber

Stress Filled Day

Yesterday for me was a pretty ho hum type of a day. Melman though was completely freaking out all day without Bill being here. At about 8:30 Melman started asking if it was time to go home, she leaves at 3:30. Every time something would come up she would start sighing, moaning and worrying about what to do. In general stressing about the job she was hired to do but is incapable of doing without someone there to watch over her shoulder.

The new guy in finance also appears to be looking for a new job, which is a really good thing for him since he is probably going to be fired soon. I also noticed that the new guy is completely and totally over whelmed with everything right now. This is normal in a new job but Bill is not training this new guy at all. He gives the new guy about ¼ of all the information he needs and then gets pissed if he doesn’t figure out the rest.

I ended up spending sometime in The White Witch’s office yesterday working on her computer. I was sitting in her chair while she sat on the desk next to me looking over my shoulder. Every time I would turn around the grand canyon made of jello was staring me right in the face. It was just like the bad accident thing I had to make a point not to look, not that I wanted to look but my eyes where drawn to the carnage.

Stress is getting to Melman again, we have spent the past 20 minutes listening to her trip to the eye doctor and her extreme amount of pain she was in last night and the lack of sleep. She told us that she wouldn’t have come in at all except she had to print some checks, which she has not done yet and has told everyone of her pain that will listen.

I thought I would add that I don't trust anyone at addroc to tell them about the blog until I'm long gone.

Dumber

A day of gas

The highlight of my day or should I say low light is the fact I had the worst case of gas that I have had in a long time. I had the fan running and I was still worried that I was going to gas out the upstairs.

Bill is out Today(Wednesday), Thursday and Friday this week to go see his mother. I feel pretty confident The White Witch will leave me alone but I’m pretty sure she will find someone to mess with. Melman is also freaking out right now with Bill being gone, its actually kind of funny.

The White Witch is wearing her white see thru shirt with black spots, remember that one smart. It’s the one that started me on my anti see thru shirt crusade. Today, thankfully, she decided to wear a shirt under it, which means we don’t have to look at her bra and its not as bad.

Dumber

Gilligan's Island

I was telling the Professor about how The Skipper had called me a lil’ buddy and how I was thinking about calling The Skipper “Ginger” for now on. The Professor started laughing and said “Actually The Skipper(used his real name) should be called ‘The Skipper’ not Ginger”. I almost couldn’t stop laughing when he said that. He then proceeded to say “If he’s the skipper and your Gilligan can I be the professor?” I couldn’t believe that he just picked everyone’s name and I came this close to telling him about the blog.

Yesterday The White Witch’s printer broke, piece of junk printer Smart purchased. I was left with the prospect of trying to figure out what was wrong with it, she said she already cleaned it, and purchasing a new one. I went for purchasing a new one. I went and got a new HP little bit higher grade so hopefully it will last and I won’t have to go back into her office.

I got the printer set up and put it in her office and got it working just fine. She asked me if it would print legal paper? My first thought was of course it would but I could not figure out how. I told her I don’t know and went and got the instruction book. When I got back she was playing with the printer pulled the paper tray holder out so then legal paper could fit. She was very proud of herself for figuring something out that I couldn’t.

Melman also informed me that new guy that replaced Marlin who replaced baby jack jack is going to be canned in the next couple of weeks. Bill and her have decided that he’s just not up to snuff and we should part our ways. I now have a really hard time looking the guy in the eyes and in general feel bad for him. Melman and Bill don’t seem to have this same problem and keep acting like we are one big happy family. This is not general knowledge so please don’t tell new guy.

What is up with Blogspot lately I have had a really hard time updating lately, it’s getting really irritating.

Dumber

Dumber = Gilligan

I had some problems posting on Thursday before I left on my mini vacation, that’s why I have two post for today so be sure and read on.

Wednesday of last week I was walking down the stairs and saw a guy sitting in a suit waiting to go in for an interview with The Skipper. As I looked at him I realized I know the guy from church. I said hi and good luck and thought to myself what am I going to say to him on Sunday and he starts asking me questions.

I went back many conversations that Smart and I have had about letting friends come to work here and knew I had to tell him the truth. Fortunately he is smarter then I am and already had many concerns from the interview and he was going to turn down the offer. I just sat there confirmed many of his concerns and didn’t have to add much. He did say though that The Head Monkey was taking a nap at his desk when he was there though.

I got an email from the Skipper today addressed to lil’ buddy. First I find this funny from the blog stand point as he is the Skipper and now I’m Gilligan. But on a professional stand point I think he’s trying to be an ass and trying to intimidate me. For my response should I address it Mary Anne or Ginger? Or am I being too sensitive?

Make sure you read the next one as it is new too.

Dumber

Password

Yesterday I had to fix the FTP program Smart set up so they could make changes to the web site for new job postings. The problem was we changed the password on the web site to keep Smart out. This fix was not a big deal but Counselor Troy acted as if I had just saved a dozen kittens from certain death, a high five and all. Wonder if Smart got that much love on the simple tasks.

Yes we changed all the passwords on the computers so smart can not get in through cyber space, and no smart I don’t think you could do it as easy as your thinking(that is not a dare, please don’t try). Anyway I left my wallet and cell phone at work last Friday and I needed them for the weekend. I have never been given a door code, we use a key less entry system instead of keys, so I knew there would be one person who would remember all the door codes, so I called Smart. And imagine this he remembered many of the codes and I was able to get in the building.

The moral of the story is if your going to go through the trouble of changing your passwords to keep someone out maybe you should also change the keys to the building.

I am off at noon today and will not be here on Friday. Have a good weekend all and fun.

Dumber

Thank you letter

Here is my first attempt at a thank you letter, let me know what you think:

Dear Parole Officer:

Thank you for taking the time to see me the other day, I do appreciate everything you helped me with.

I would beg you to not just look at the results of my test but also look at time served and the conditions I have had to work under. The day I came in for the interview The White Witch was walking around in a see thru shirt with a V cut showing cleavage like the Grand Canyon, of course the Grand Canyon made of jello. No man should have to see such horrors.

Also the people I work with are complete technology idiots. Once again the day of the interview I had just installed a new projector, everyone I work with thought this was the neatest invention ever. But I saw you have at least one in the meeting room and I would be willing to bet everybody accepts it as a necessary piece of business.

Again thank you for time and I look forward to working with you in reaching an agreement for my parole.

Thank you

Dumber

Let me know if I should make any changes.

Now to answer comments.

Yes Smart you did warn me and I did study and that's why I got an A on part of it. The other part I did not expect at all, they had me querying the oracle database using SQL code, ansi version 1, not exactly what I currently use.

Highlander you are right I need to find the humor again, my goal is to find at least one funny thing to write about each day.

I hope you are right smartass. As I replay the interview I wonder was it more to push what I know and to find out how I would react. I don’t know really but you are correct, I have been to negative lately.

Dumber

Tough interview

I just got back from the interview and Smart’s place of employment and let me say the test was a lot harder then I thought. The test consisted of two parts one was write your own sql and create a form. I really struggled with the SQL part, mainly because they asked me to write it in a way I’m not used to, but I would give myself an F on this phase of the test. The other part was to create a form which I would give myself an A on.

My initial gut reaction after the interview was that I will not get the job. I do hope I am wrong. The part that I hate about test’s for a job is that they don’t grade you on how well you’ll go out and find answers or if your not under the gun how you will perform.

Sorry for the negative attitude but when I had the first interview I felt as though I had a 95% chance that I would get the job. Now I don’t have that warm fuzzy feeling anymore.

Dumber

Interview Today

Nothing to report today, except I have my 2nd interview at 10:00AM and I am extremely hopefully that it will go well.

Dumber

No vacation for you

The tale of 2 companies continued on Friday with a meeting with Bill, The White Witch, the Professor and myself. In a nutshell the Professor and I have decided that we should use Microsoft Project Server for our scheduling needs. Now this adds up to a lot of cash to be spent, about $8,000 on just for the server and project professional alone. Then in addition over the next 3 to 5 months we would need to upgrade to Windows 2003 and SQL server this would be another $12,000. Before we went into the meeting I thought I must be the biggest idiot to walk in there and ask for that much money.

The professor sat there told them all the wonderful work he is working on, which was good stuff. After he got done I got the job of telling them how much money this was going to cost. With a bill of $20,000 coming across the table, which could have been more, they were surprisingly supportive. Never once did they say well with the tight money situation we shouldn’t do it, which I totally expected.

Instead the White Witch was amazed that we would need to upgrade the server again. She went on about how these software companies screw you by forcing you to upgrade and now we would have to allocate more money for upgrades now. Was this the first time she had heard this?

This week I am suppose to take half day Thursday and full day Friday off. For this time off I only 4 hours of vacation and the rest will need to be personal time. Bill comes up to me today and says “Is there anything special why you need to take personal time, Your not suppose to take personal time just for vacation”. I just sat there completely dumb founded. He ended it by saying something like “We’ll have to figure out what to put down so you can use your personal time.”

I basically I have 1 month until my review and then I would get more vacation. Or better yet I have a couple of weeks until I leave for a new company.

Dumber

the tale of 2 companies

I feel like I’m working in 2 different companies. The first one and the one I would like to get away from is the, we don’t have enough cash to pay anything and vendors are putting us on hold. This is also the low moral everyone hates the company and would like to walk out the door.

The other company, the one I want to see, is the one that The White Witch, Bill and the Nutty Professor live in. Their view is that times are tough now but just wait until things really get rolling we’ll be just fine. They are still planning for the future and everybody loves the company.

I have a couple of objections to viewing Addroc as the second company. First we are half way through the year and we have yet to meet projection. Eventually they need to admit things are not going like they planned and cut back accordingly. Second at any given moment there is at least 1 person if not 2 ready to walk out the door utterly frustrated.

On the good days, which are becoming fewer and fewer, I can see company 2 through all the craziness. I can see the hope the dreams that the 3 idiots see. But then I wake up and see that there is no hope for this company and at best they are second rate company in a second rate industry.

Enough complaining about the lack of money.

This weekend the family and I went for a bike ride. My 4 year old was riding in the carrier behind me saying pointless comments about nothing at all. When all of a sudden she says “Daddy you need a bigger seat, because your butt is kind of big.” I of course thanked her for her observation and kept biking along.

Dumber

Interview

I don’t know if anything of significance happened yesterday or not. I was stressing pretty bad about the interview and not really paying attention to what was going on at work. There was no reason to stress though.

I left work at 12:00 went home ate lunch and tried to relax a little. Left way to early for interview and got there about 25 minutes early. Drove around for awhile went to the bathroom at Safeway and went back to find the entrance and go in.

I got there and Smart showed me around for a bit. I’ll say this he has a pretty cool work area. Although all those windows might be distracting. Went up and interviewed and I felt I did alright. I’m very qualified for the position, as it is exactly what I have done at Addroc. I left there about 2:45 and they called me about 3:30 for a second interview.

At the end of the interview she asked me why I wanted to leave my current job. My gut answer, that I didn’t share was “because they are all crazy and The White Witch is incompetent.” To play it safe I said “I’m looking for more opportunity for advancement.” She also asked me what is the most stressful part of my job right now. I was completely honest on this question and said “Having to listen to finance talk about which vendors they aren’t going to pay and who’s put us on hold.”

I just got an email from our ISP saying if we don’t pay our bill by june 15 they may cut us off. Can we say goodbye to email. Melman said they are scheduled for payment today.

Dumber

Money Problems

We got the loan but things are still not getting any better. The White Witch is doing everything possible to not use the money on anything at all, to the point suppliers are putting us on hold or making us use a credit card to pay up front. They are having to put so much on credit card right now they have up the limit on the purchasing guys card to $25,000 it was only $7,500.

Billable Sales were also about $200,000 below projection for the month, 300,000 vs 500,000. Nobody can say what is going at all, which for me is the scary part. Going along this current course I don’t see Addroc making it more than a year. Hopefully I won’t be around to find out though.

Today is the big interview at Smart’s place of employment. The more I do research on the company and read about it the more I like it. One difference between this job interview and the last one is that I think I am ready to go. Back in December I was still hopeful that things would improve, but now I know things won’t. In fact with Smart leaving I can see the same patterns that got him in trouble repeating for me.

I will end this post with saying I think Addroc is in real trouble of not making through the year.

Dumber

Personal Stuff

Nothing much happened at work after I posted on Friday. I did tell Melman though on Friday that the only bad thing about a 3 day weekend is that I have to come back to work.

We had a crazy weekend. Saturday the pool we joined opened so we went and played for a couple of hours. This actually wore me out more then the kids so Sunday I was already wiped out. Sunday we went purchased me some new running shoes, not for running just as everyday shoes.

Sunday night we decided to sleep outside in a tent with the kids. My youngest has a really bad fear of the wind and we are trying the camping thing out back before they go with boy scouts and girl scouts. Needless to say I didn’t get nearly enough sleep and was awake by 5:30AM.

Monday all I wanted to do was sleep but instead we drove over to Smarts place of employment so I know where to go for my interview. After that we went back to the pool and played some more. Once again had a great time.

I told my wife at dinner that I need to go back to work just to get some rest. Oh and in between all the above I mowed and watered the grass, cleaned the house, cleaned the garage out and helped some friends with a large multi family garage sale they where having as a fund raiser Friday night and Saturday morning. I don’t think my chair at work has ever felt so restful even though I don’t feel like I’m floating on air.

Dumber

With my new responsibilities I am unfortunate enough to have to talk more and more with the employees of Addroc. One of the underlying themes when I talk to just about anyone is an absolute disgust of working here. I would say that morale is only getting lower and lower right now. The employees in general are ready to walk out the door and not come back.

I was talking to the most important sales monkey we have and he is extremely disgusted with things right now. I would say that he is about ready to leave except he makes big money and knows he’ll never make this much again. I have never worked for a place where everyone was so disgusted with their work environment.

I actually feel bad for most of the people around here. None of them have a college education, all they can do is work at Addroc or at another messed up company within Addroc’s market. I was talking to gardening penguin and she was talking about a similar company in town that was more messed up then here. I on the other hand know that someday soon I will be released from jail and be out of this crazy industry.

For lunch today my daughter’s and son’s school had a picnic that I went to. It was a beautiful day outside and did not want to come back to work. To be honest it doesn’t matter where I work I don’t think I would have wanted to come back to work.

Dumber

A drumal tool

I had a very exciting day yesterday, with the possible new job and all. Even past that lots of eventful stuff happened. I also need to mentioned Addroc got the loan from the bank, but now Bill and The White Witch are trying to figure how not to use it to pay off suppliers that we haven’t paid in months.

Monday somebody found 3 baby bunnies, 2 to 3 days old under a picnic table that mama bunny abandoned. Cowboy Penguin being the animal lover he is took the animals in to try and save them. He went to the store and bought some milk for them and took really good care of them. I even brought my youngest daughter in to see the one surviving one yesterday. She got to hold it and pet it and of course loved it. Unfortunately though the last one died yesterday, but I give Cowboy penguin a lot of credit for trying. I think it shows that he has a really big heart.

On one of my trips downstairs I was walking by the women’s bathroom when I heard someone in there using what sounded like a drumal tool. I walked by thinking what in the world would somebody be using a drumal tool in the women’s bathroom for. Then I looked over and noticed that Counselor Troy was not at her desk and it dawned on me that she was in the bathroom pumping breast milk. It made me laugh thinking of her sitting on the toilet in the stall shirt up pumping away. Couldn’t Addroc give her a little more self respecting place to do this?

Also Counselor Troy mentioned that she has stopped smoking. I had to stop from laughing at her as she smoked all the way through her pregnancy and now that she has had the baby she stops.

Dumber

Changes (Guest Post)

The changes are more them talking then truth I think. But here is what was said and you can read between the lines.

Gardening Penguin (GP): There seems to be disruption at Addroc.
Smart: Do you know what?
GP: No, people just seem to be quiet. You know the quiet before the next storm. I talked to JS from a competitor the other day.
Smart: Are you thinking of leaving Addroc? Would you go to this competitor to wori?
GP: If he will have me yeah.
Smart: Wow, well you know that the one Monkey is taking me brochures into that competitors company for me to possible bring on as a personal client.
GP: That would be awesome. They will soon be needing your services.
Smart: I hope so could be a nice basis for me to go out on my own.
GP: I agree, even the Monkey has mentioned going over to this competitor if they don’t leave him alone at Addroc.

This got me thinking. If the Monkey went over to the competitor what would be chances of him taking some of the new work for his clients with him? If he did that could really hurt Addroc sales since they have lived on some of those sales for a while. Addroc doesn’t care how they treat anyone so why should I care about them. If he was able to go and take that work with him I would laugh and love every minute.

Also everyone wish Dumber some good luck. I got an email from him today that he got a call from my new company. I know they have already hired one gal for the position but they have another spot still so we need Dumber to move here with me. I know that we just received another big contract today and need more people and they are moving to an area that he wants to grow in. This will be a great move for him and for me. My reason is as follows.

When I graduated college I helped a friend from college get a job at the company I got hired to. This is pre Addroc. Well this new job that I am at now I got the lead through this buddy and a friend of his that is here in this company. So he kind of re-paid me the favor of getting him a job. Now if Dumber gets hired here then I helped him and who knows in 5 or 10 years from now he might be the leading guy to help me again. See it is always good to keep your friends and stay in touch.

Since there was already a post from Dumber about the interview I think you can see his enthusiasm. I know from talking to people that most people that have been hired here have come from internal references. Anyway good luck Dumber.

Smart

Interview!!!!!

I have a job interview at smart's new work. It's on Wednesday at 2 PM, 1 week. That's the earliest opening she had for me unfortunately. Say a prayer for me, I would really like to become smarter.

Dumber

Bill = Bad Manager

I like the name Ginarrbrik for Bill, I think it describes him very well. This is the gnome from the Lion the Witch and Wardrobe that serves the White Witch. The only problem is that I can barley pronounce it and can barely spell it. As I write my posts I can’t be bothered with trying to remember such an important characters name. For this reason I think Bill should remain Bill.

Talking of Bill, Bill decided to take today off again. This is not a big deal, although I left wondering why he is taking time off, maybe a job interview. I used to think this would be a horrible turn of events, no Bill to protect me from The White Witch, but now I’m thinking it might be a good thing. Maybe we could get someone in here that knew how to be a manager instead of a life sucker.

Even though Bill feels he should tell The White Witch that he is taking the day of he refuses to tell any of us that he will not be here. Melman and I found out he wasn’t going to be here because we overheard him telling the Nutty Professor. Direct contact with your employees is strictly forbidden in his management methodology.

I also like “The CEO” being called the White Witch. I think it’s far more descriptive. For now on her name change will be official.

Dumber

Bad manager

Ginarrbrik (AKA Bill) is starting to fall down my list of favorite people at Addroc. Yesterday he walked over to Smart’s old desk set some papers down and started walking off. I looked at him like “You do realize nobody sits over there anymore”. His response was “Its some invoice’s for window’s xp licensing, I’m sure Smart had it somewhere over here. Someday I’m going to have to go through the files and organize them.”

Can we all say Ginarrbrik has a hard time delegating responsibility. Can we also say Ginarrbrik is not a good manager. He is already complaining about new guy not being as far along as he should be (That’s the new guy to replace Marlin). Now is this new guys fault Or perhaps Ginarrbrik? Please vote I would like to know what you think.

Melman’s health is taking another turn for the worse. This time it’s her legs that are hurting really bad, to the point she can barely walk. With most people I would be concerned and care a lot, but not with Melman. She came in this morning and the doctor told her that her legs hurt because she has been doing a lot of walking. Of course this is Melman I don’t think she leaves her bed on the weekends and she complains about having to walk up the stairs. And the only walking she will do is to go shopping.

Dumber